The Best Bumper Stickers

1. Constipated People Don't Give A Shit.

2. Practice Safe Sex, Go Screw Yourself.

3. If You Drink, Don't Park. Accidents Cause People.

4. Who Lit The Fuse On Your Tampon?

5. If You Don't Believe In Oral Sex, Keep Your Mouth Shut.

6. Please Tell Your Pants It's Not Polite To Point.

7. If That Phone Was Up Your Butt, Maybe You Could Drive A Little Better.

8. My Kid Got Your Honour Roll Student Pregnant.

9. Thank You For Pot Smoking.

10. To All You Virgins: Thanks For Nothing.

11. Impotence: Nature's Way Of Saying "No Hard Feelings".

12. If You Can Read This, I've Lost My Trailer.

13. It's Not How You Pick Your Nose, But Where You Put The Booger.

14. If You're Not A Haemorrhoid, Get Off My Ass.

15. I Have The Body Of A God .... Buddha

16. So Many Pedestrians - So Little Time

17. Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult

18. If We Quit Voting, Will They All Go Away?

19. Honk If Anything Falls Off

20. Cover Me. I'm Changing Lanes

21. He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost But Miles From The Next Exit

22. I Refuse To Have A Battle Of Wits With An Unarmed Person

23. You! Out Of The Gene Pool!

24. I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To

25. If Sex Is A Pain In The Ass, Then You're Doing It Wrong...

26. Fight Crime: Shoot Back!

27. If You Can Read This, Please Flip Me Back Over... (Seen upside down on a jeep)

28. Necrophilia: That Uncontrollable Urge To Crack Open A Cold One.

29. Boldly Going Nowhere

30. Cat: The Other White Meat

31. Caution - Driver Legally Blonde

32. Don't Be Sexist - Bitches Hate That

33. Heart Attacks .... God's Revenge For Eating His Animal Friends.

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